Maestro's Darling
Plant in me an unquenchable desire to stay. Found in me the audacious desire, the spectacular courage of permanence. Oh God, that my tabernacle would be grounded firmly on this earth with its windows thrown open to the heavens. That I might stand, feet firmly on the ground but eyes trained on the beauty of your throne room.
This is Your world, my Father’s world, and You have created it and will rule it according to Your will.
How beautiful to see a sunset in all its glory. How devastating to see a democracy on its knees. Nothing here is elegant, God. Nothing here is as I dreamed or as I was taught. This world I have inherited is broken, and the ideals that I was given are archaic and out of practice.
To dream, my God! To hope, my God!
As I watch the crude flames of the future burning at the hems of my visions, I marvel at the fragility I feel. I see all my thoughts for the future balance on a knife’s edge.
You have told me to wait on You. You have asked me to hope in You.
I would be fixed by certain fear, but I know that You are always in control. Still, I wonder at the ways in which You move. I mourn the death of a legacy. I marvel at how quickly worlds fall.
In my short life, I have wished many times to die. Taking account of everything this world has to offer, I know nothing can compare with the glorious eternity awaiting me.
Why stay?
I desire You. I desire to know You. I desire myself. I desire to know myself. Why stay?
I must believe then, that I live for You. You, in Your omniscience, have pored an infinity of consideration over me. You have determined the best end to my life. You crafted, before my conception, the traits of my being, the purpose of my life, and my mark on humanity.
You have designed me to worship and enjoy You. You have designed me to be cherished and enjoyed by You. I know, no matter how strained it feels descending through the clouds, that You—in Your boundless adoration—care for me.
I would be Your darling anywhere.
Give me strength to be Your darling here.
Fasten my feet in the crude earth, but open my heart to the miracle of honest worship. Put in me a song to elevate the themes of this earth to the music of Your kingdom’s return. Fit me with eyes that see Your glory at work in this society. Gild my tongue with Your praise, armor on my spirit.You gave the angels wings and wheels; You gave me feet and hands. Teach my hands to war, God. Enlarge my steps on this earth. Fasten me to this earth. Let me feel its pleasures and its sorrows. Let me live a life full of, not anticipation, but quiet expectancy. Let me sit as a satisfied guest and wait on You and Your next wonder. Let me rise up as a warrior and fight for You. Instruct me, oh God, in my citizenship. Teach me, Maestro of the universe, how to sing with this far too human voice.
Show me the glory of mortality before I lose it to eternity.
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